jeudi 19 août 2010

The Height of Rudeness

I don't normally like to write about stuff that has not much of a relationship to my life in Sydney or my future life in France but here goes...

I have had it up to here with rudeness!! I'm not talking about obvious things like pushing in front of you in a queue but I'm talking about modern life and etiquette.

I am just sick to death of the selfishness that goes on with people. Sure we are ALL busy, being "busy" is simply an excuse for saying, "Your thing is not important to me so that's why I haven't responded."

I am not saying I am perfect either but I do try very very hard.

As predicted, I do find French people (and continental Europeans in general) more polite than Anglos, who are more polite than 'other' races/cultures.

Some things that have happened to me lately:

Having less than half the people actually RSVP to a party of mine that I invited them to. I told myself I would not be a 'mother hen' and chase them down and I won't, but deep down inside I really start to lose respect for these people and their so-called 'busy' lives. I know that being busy is always an excuse because when it's important to them (ie their OWN event) funnily, then they always seem to have their act together and are not so 'busy'.

Giving a friend a gift and not even getting a Thank You, or giving a card and have them not read it in front of you or mention it to you later.

Telling a so-called friend some amazing life news (such as the new boy I met) and receiving NO reply whatsoever. I really start to wonder if these people really are my friends... Or telling them in person and not getting a "Oh, that's great!" but a blank look and no comment and change of subject!

Taking 3 weeks or 3 months to reply to an email. So not on. I understand that people live on their mobile phones these days but that's no excuse for ignoring all your emails.

And when you say you're going to do something, mean it! I take a lot of photos in my normal every day life and when someone I'm with asks for a photo that I've taken of him/her/us I email it to them within 3 days. Most other people would say they'd do it but you'd have to hound them for the next 3 months and then they'd mysteriously 'lose' the photos.

Another one is being on time. I am sick to death of my sister (and bf) always being late to our family get-togethers. Excuses, excuses and more excuses. Even when they have the least amount to travel. Laziness and selfishness again.

Things like this are just really shitting me this past week or two. All it is is selfishness really. They are not willing to share some of their precious time with you, because your life is not important to them. All it makes me think is - Get off your high horse! It only takes a few seconds to send an email or send a text message, or say Thank You! Stop using not having time as an excuse for everything.

On that note, the opposite of all this selfishness with one's time are volunteers. People who do amazing work, give up a LOT of their time and yet for no financial reward. But the benefits are enormous. I've never been happier than when I've given up some of my time for a good cause. That's all I have to say about that. What goes around comes around. I'm not overly religious but I believe in karma and all that. Give some of your time to others, be polite and stop being so damn rude and selfish!

Actually I have another story to tell where a few days ago I saw a man walking down the street with an envelope and about 20x $50 bills came flying out of it. I got his attention and helped him scoop them all up off the footpath (sidewalk) just in time before the wind flew off with them... I could have easily just taken all the money and kept it myself.. of course I would never do that. But you know what? I don't even recall getting a Thank You for that! Admittedly I think he was just too shocked over the situation but still...

Perhaps I should end on a more positive note. One of the things that initially attracted me to my wonderful new man were his manners and politeness, this was WAY before I had any romantic interest in him. He'd say Please and Thank You at all the right times. He'd hold the door for me. He'd call exactly when he'd say he would. He would be kind and courteous to every single person we came across like waitresses, shop assistants, etc. He'd always email and text msg in a timely manner. And when he emailed it was with perfect grammar, spelling and punctuation (not SMS speak). But it wasn't just to me! It was to everyone. He is kind and polite and wonderful to everyone in his life - his family, his friends and random strangers he'd meet. Being polite is a HUGE deal for me and in that regard I am so happy with him!

Another positive story is that a friend of mine had a 1st birthday party for her/their 1 year old daughter and after the party she wrote an email to every single one of the 40+ guests (personalised, not CC) thanking them for coming and for their gift. I was really touched by that as that is NOT a normal every day occurrence for me. (I thank people when they come to my events but that was the first time I had received something similar).


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