When friends become parents

Continuing on from my previous post... A lot of change happens in 2 years. I can't believe it had been 2 years already since I last saw my friend and 1.5 years since I was last in Paris.

I was surprised when my friend told he had gotten married a few months back. Then I joked that the next time we meet he will have kids and he said, "I don't think so..."

Somehow, I believe he will though. If I leave it another 2 years I'm quite certain he will have at least one kid... Afterall, France has a very high birth rate.

And it got me thinking...

All these French people I met on language exchange sites... It was a coincidence that ALL of them were couples, none of them were singles. And when I arrived in France I visited them all around the country and it was very generous and kind of them to allow me to stay with them and show me around their home town.

And then, one year or so later, they all had kids. I would like to revisit them but I can't. It may sound selfish but I feel stressed around babies and young kids and they wouldn't be able to 'hang out' anyway as their whole schedule and life is now around their kids.

I think back to my friends at home, and I think to bloggers I read (and feel I 'know' because I've been reading their blog for many many years)... Their lives and blogs used to be so interesting and now it just revolves around their kids. Nothing wrong with that and it's completely normal but at the same time it saddens me as I always feel I've 'lost' my friends that way. We no longer have anything in common, we no longer have anything to talk about and they don't do much with their own lives because their life IS their kids' life (as evidenced by those who even put their child's photo as their own profile photo which I kind of find a little disturbing).

There are so many female bloggers I read and their blogs used to be so interesting but after having kids, now every single post is the same... there is nothing new or interesting.

And as much as I try to stay friends with these people I just can't. I've experienced it back home and here. People generally don't bother to stay in contact with you if you aren't going through the same things in life (except by superficial methods like Facebook posts). I go to their kid's birthday parties... and I'll start a conversation with a stranger who'll ask me about my kids.. I'll tell them I don't have any.. and then they're thinking, "Oh shit... what can we talk about then?" and all the while I wonder why I am even there and can't wait to leave...

I shouldn't complain about this I know and I know people will tell me I can still continue to be friends with these people but I really don't feel I can :(

As I write this post... last night I actually had a dream that I was pregnant and gave birth but instead of having the baby the normal way, it came out of my left side! (where my waist is) and I 'only' had a 10cm scar and was walking around normally straight afterwards. The baby was completely normal, healthy and happy... so it was a nice dream.

Apparently

Babies in dreams are common, because every creation begins with an idea. Many people are invested in learning how to create in their lives, whether it's a new job, a greater relationship, or creating the type of person they desire to become. Next time when you have a baby in your dreams, celebrate the opportunity to learn more about yourself and creativity.

and

To see a baby in your dream signifies innocence, warmth and new beginnings. Babies symbolize something in your own inner nature that is pure, vulnerable, helpless and/or uncorrupted. If you dream that the baby is smiling at you, then it suggests that you are experiencing pure joy. You do not ask for much to make you happy.

(image from here). 

A quoi ça sert l’amour ? What good is love?

Cute, whimsical, emotional and beautiful animation! I actually immediately recognised some of the backdrops in Paris too :)

"J'aime"

On French boys

I found this girl on YouTube some time ago when I was looking for videos of French people talking. Unfortunately it turns out she speaks English in most of her videos and not French but anyway... this is her latest video and a detour from her usual make-up tutorials. Quite amusing to watch, I actually didn't find any of it the least bit surprising given my own experiences and stories I've heard...

Paris, je t'aime

Related post you may want to read first as I refer back to those events when I went to Nice and Paris two weeks ago


My super awesome day... My fifth visit to Paris...

Well to be honest I did not want to go to Paris today but I HAD to go and I'll explain soon in an upcoming blog post. For the moment I just want to say that I had a mammoth day - 16 hours worth and despite feeling a bit tired at the start after getting up at 5am I feel great now and it's 10:30pm. For some strange reason I actually feel quite energetic despite such an early morning and long day. Why?

I HAD THE BEST TIME IN PARIS TODAY.  The Gods were certainly looking after me. It was the most perfect weather you could ever imagine and it was a shock to me because EVERY time I've been to Paris (4 times prior) the weather was either unpredictable or cloudy or rainy or windy or freezing or all of the above! This was the FIRST time I'd ever seen Paris completely sunny with no clouds and with hardly a hint of wind at all. It was 26°C.

I had to take the earliest train that left from my town because I had to get there as early as possible to finish up with "the issue" (yes I can say with a huge sigh of relief it's FINALLY done and I can reveal the whole saga soon). They said I had to wait while it was being done or I could come back in an hour , hour and a half. So I chose to get some things done during that time....

I arrived in Gare de Lyon in Paris (my old friend now I've been there so many times as it's the gateway to the south and south-east of France) and wanted/needed to change the time of my return ticket however I couldn't find the office/shop where to do that and I was getting impatient so I forgot about it for the moment and high-tailed it to where I needed to go.

So during this 1.5 hour window I went to the nearest SNCF/Grandes Lignes station which was Gare St Lazare to do this. I also had some problems collecting all of my tickets for Italy from the machines this morning (and being so early, the SNCF office in my town wasn't open) so I had 2 things to do there. I had planned to meet my friend in Paris again but it didn't feel like it would be worth just spending 1.5 hours together so I decided to take a later train 2 hours later and pay 8 euros for the privilege of changing this ticket.

Then, I had some other errand-y thing to do. My cousin asked me to buy her a Longchamp bag (that is, she'll pay me back) because she says they are so much more expensive in Australia. Since I couldn't do it on my last trip to Paris I thought this was the perfect opportunity and how coincidental that all the big department stores were right near Gare St Lazare!

So I bought it from the nearest department store Printemps (which means Spring in French, aptly) and then I needed to find a post office to send it to her. I thought I'd only go if there was one nearby otherwise I couldn't be bothered. Then again I don't want to carry more than I have to all day either. So I found one - at 56 Rue Cler, Paris, corner of Avenue La Motte Picquet (7th arrondissement). Massive RAVE for this post office! OMG. Remember before (in various posts) I said I lived in China? In China and most Asian countries the stores are overstaffed and there is always someone to help/serve you but in Australia and most Western countries it's the opposite and it's certainly the case in France. However I had quite a unique experience here. There were SO MANY STAFF and all so friendly and helpful. It's as if they had been trained by someone.... not in France. Hahaha. At first the lady that helped me (altogether there were 3-4 people that helped me!!) said there was only ONE box that I could use to send something to Australia and it was HUGE and cost a whopping 34 euros (that's with the shipping fee included). There were no bubble-lined envelopes like we have in the post office shops in Australia nor anything smaller but eventually she did find something smaller, luckily so I used that. All done. I felt it was my good deed for the day to 'chase' this thing for my cousin.

And for my reward I got a gorgeous green Longchamp paper bag to put my trench coat in! This morning it was freezing and then during the day I was sweating like crazy and had to take off my layers. It's always such a challenge figuring out what the heck to wear. Either I freeze in the morning (which I did anyway) and be comfortable later or be comfortable in the morning and have to carry round a big heavy coat. Luckily I only wore my autumn/spring trench coat and not my winter one (which some people still wear!!)

Actually I just realised my story got convoluted. After buying the handbag I went back to the office to pick up (something) and then I started walking towards the Eiffel Tower because I could see it and thought I might as well go there since I had almost 3 hours to kill before meeting my friend. That's when I stumbled across the post office by accident. Then, I happened to accidentally pass by the exact same café that my friend and I ate at too last time, only 2 weeks go.  I didn't even realise I had walked the same path - what a coincidence!

I passed a small Carrefour so went and popped in to buy some lunch and a drink. I was starving but I had had no time to eat or look for something cheap to eat until then.

Well Printemps pissed me off because they wanted me to pay 1 euro to use the toilets (considering I just spent a large sum of money in their shop!). I refuse to pay for public toilets unless I'm desperate. Since I wasn't I held it in. So as I was walking I came across a free toilet in the street. One of those automatic self-cleaning ones. You have to wait a while after each person for them to clean it...

While I was waiting in this queue (yes there was a queue!) This taxi driver guy (youngish) looked at me and it kind of weirded me out a bit so I looked away. Then I looked back at him and as he drove away he gave me a big huge smile. Ah it was kind of nice... ;)

It was soooooooooo sunny. OMG it was so beautiful. And also, I have never really seen the Eiffel Tower in the day time either. Only in the late afternoon or evening. I couldn't stop taking photos of it from every angle and distance possible. To me it's like Sydney's Opera House or the Pearl Tower in Shanghai. Photos will never do them justice because it's only until you see them in real life that you realise how incredibly HUGE they are and how awesome they are, wonderful pieces of architecture!!

I did it all backwards compared to my trip during Christmas. I started at the little park next to it and ended up in Trocadero. This time I also bought some Eiffel Tower keyrings just for the heck of it. Last time they offered 6 or 7 to me for 1 Euro and this time the guy offered me 3 for 1 Euro. I should've said 6 at least but I said '5' and he goes '4' and I said 'no' and he was like 'Ok, 5'. I couldn't believe how easy it was (and kicked myself for not saying 6 or 7 haha).

Unfortunately it's the WORST possible time for taking photos, in the middle of the day with the strong sun and lots of harsh shadows.

I had lunch in the park and I could not believe it had only been a little over 3 months since I was here and absolutely freezing in the snow, rain and wind!! Plus it was almost empty then and now, it was teeming with crowds, holidaymakers and tourists.

Anyway it took me so long to get to the top of Trocadero I realised I would be a little late meeting my friend at 2pm so I texted him...


After 2 line changes I eventually made it to our meeting spot, Abbesses métro station. He said it's close to where he lives so he knows it well but the reason he suggested meeting there is because it's one of the highest points of the city so it boasts spectacular views. The first thing we did was look at the "I love you wall" right next the métro exit. (Oh, by the way, luckily he advised me beforehand to take the lift/elevator and not the stairs since there are soooo many. That is one of the biggest lifts I have ever seen in that métro staiton).

It's also near where the Basilique du Sacré Coeur is. Now, a few years ago when I went to Paris for the first time I did see the Basilica (but I got off at Montmartre station instead). However it was an extremely short visit. I don't even know what possessed me to tell him this but because it was such a strong memory for me I just blurted it out. I was with my ex (my longest relationship) and I really wanted to see Moulin Rouge and the Basilica but we didn't have much time. He didn't want to come and see them with me so he went back to the hotel whereas I rushed around like crazy trying to see both in a short space of time. So I didn't have time to climb all those stairs but no such problem today!

I had a whopping 3.5 hours to spend with my friend. OMG the view was utterly breathtaking from up there. But not just of the view but just the buildings, the paths, the stairs and even the tourists themselves.. everything just made Paris even better than what you could imagine. I can't describe it. It was just so amazing and beautiful. He gave me ideas and tips about what I could take photos of (that weren't your typical touristy shots).

The funniest thing was when this old guy (trying to sell some little handicraft animals) started talking about me (something nice but I can't remember what exactly) to a customer in French, assuming I couldn't understand and I looked straight at him and said, "I speak French!" And we got talking and he asked me the typical question of where I'm from, etc etc.. then he asked my friend if I was his fiancée! OMG that was pretty embarrassing and hilarious. Then, as so often happens these days he started flattering me saying how pretty I am and then telling my friend he should get together with me... ahem... I remained silent as it was nice but really embarrassing.

That reminds too, that back at the park next to the Eiffel Tower I asked a random guy to take a photo of me for me. He was pretty young and reminded me of one of my students. This random (American?) lady walked past and asked if we'd like her to take a photo of us together! That is hilarious that she thought we were together?!

Since it was so hot and sunny I had an ice cream craving again. My friend said not to buy it there as it's touristy there so costs more but also he knows where the BEST ice cream in Paris is and that we should go there instead. At first I thought we wouldn't have enough time but we did.

After walking around the Basilica and seeing the funiculaire (cable car) AND all the places around there where the film Amélie was filmed (the pay phone is not there!) etc... He had a suggestion. Oh this was going to be good!

He said he'd come by scooter and he could take me to this island (Ile Saint Louis) to find this ice cream parlor. Sounds great except... I have a fear of riding motorbikes or scooters. It's rather a personal reason why but I thought I'd better get over it. I already refused an offer from another friend for a scooter ride. And these past few years I'm all for challenging myself to do 'hard' things or trying to get over my fears.

I actually said both in French and in English: Je vais mourir / I'm going to die . A tourist passing by heard me and laughed. Seriously deep down I was SHIT SCARED yet excited at the same time. Here goes nothing. At first it was very very scary. You have to sit up very straight and hold on really tight. He said NOT to lean with him when he leans and remain upright. At first I kept knocking my helmet against his. My palms were sweating like crazy and also bright red from holding onto the handlebar things so tightly. It was a billion times better than that bus ride last time. I wanted to film the whole trip but I couldn't bare to let go of the bars meaning I had no hands to hold the camera!

I think the ride went for a total of about 30 minutes and afterwards it became easier as I got more confident so I could hold on with only my left hand, and film with my right :) It was sooooo thrilling. I can't begin to describe it. Also with the sun and also the cool breeze it was just so comfortable and nice. He explained all the buildings and monuments as we drove past although I couldn't really hear much.

I actually had visions of me flying off, no kidding. I was still scared the whole time I think but I just had to pretend I was not because I was just having too much fun and couldn't keep the smile off my face. I toured Paris on scooter.

And the scariest part? When he drove into that massive huge roundabout where the Arc de Triomphe is! The one that's notorious for accidents. I think I screamed out of both fear and excitement.

So we made it to Ile Saint Louis in one piece and luckily didn't have to wait 30 minutes in the queue for the ice cream like he assumed we would. That place was filled to the brim with tourists (all eating ice creams or drinking coffee). I offered to shout him this time but he refused. The ice cream was nice but I wouldn't say it was as good as the one I had in Nice. When I told him I went to a fab ice cream place in Nice he knew EXACTLY which one I was talking about!

By then we only had a little bit of time left. We did a quick walk and crossed those little bridges... that's when I came across those padlocks on the Le Pont des Arts which I only know about because of the TV show The Amazing Race. The locks that lovers put there, 'sealing' their love. Awwww.... It was so beautiful I wanted to take so many photos of it but he reminded me we didn't have much time left.

Towards the very end and right after we had talked about a very personal subject, I asked about his girlfriend. I don't even know why I torture myself like that. The worst part of all of this is that I really like him and I'm pretty sure he knows it but he already has a girlfriend. But even if he didn't, I tell myself it's a totally dumb idea anyway since it'd be a long-distance relationship and I'm terrible at those.

Anyway, then he dropped me off at Gare de Lyon again, like déjà vu from 2 weeks ago. Except this time it was lovely and warm and not cold. I thought I'd sleep on the way home (it was nice and quiet on the train- yay!) but I was so hyped up I was not tired at all and watched the gorgeous landscape outside the window transform from dead flat to mountainous. Also all these bright fluorescent yellow rapeseed flowers had blossomed everywhere in the fields. I couldn't believe how beautiful it was and I cannot believe that it is light until 9 pm these days.

For me, you'll always remember your 'firsts' and that scooter ride was my first and to say that I did it in Paris, well that was like a dream come true. :) I just cannot believe what a lucky week this has been for me. Everything has been going so well and also having perfect weather today was also lucky and for that I will be eternally grateful to the Gods above!

Guess who's going to Italy?

Guess who's going to Italy? Me! AH I'm so excited I can hardly contain myself. It was a last minute decision and I do regret that a little because one of my train tickets (the one coming back home) was hideously expensive (it cost more than the other 4 tickets combined!). Still, even if they take longer, I much prefer trains and they are also a lot cheaper than planes if you want last minute tickets.

I'm off on a 10 day trip to :
Genoa, Pisa, Florence and Rome
or in French: Gênes, Pise, Florence, Rome 
or in Italian: Genova, Pisa, Firenze, Roma

A bit off topic but it kind of annoys me why they bother to change the city names! I think they should just stay what they are in their native language and not be 'dumbed down' for foreigners! All of my students pronounce the city Lyon as Lie-on because they think that's how it should be pronounced in English! (instead of the French Lee-yon) Grr... I never say Lie-on. It sounds awful.

I have always had an affinity with Italy, I think. There is a really personal thing which I can't share here but there is a very specific reason why I MUST go to Rome.

Also, from a very young age I discovered that Italian was my favourite cuisine and still is. From the ages of around 8-15 I was obsessed with Garfield, that big fat lazy orange cat. I collected all the comic books and various Garfield memorabilia. I related to him because I adore Italian food and I despise Mondays. And Garfield likes to annoy Odie like I used to annoy my little sister.

When I was in high school I had many friends of Italian origins as there was a small community of Italian people in a suburb not far from our school.

Then, thinking about recent events, I discovered that it was a coincidence that my ex in Sydney, my ex in France, and my new best friend here, C, ALL have Italian or part-Italian origins too.

When I was in Nice recently, I couldn't help but notice there was such an Italian air about that place. It made me want to go to Italy more and more. In fact, I've been wanting to go there for the longest time and had planned to go there a few years back with my ex but it never eventuated.

A note about Venice. They say it's the most romantic city in the world and perhaps that is true. That's why I don't want to go there... alone. Maybe it's dumb, maybe it's corny, maybe it's superstitious, but I don't want to go there until I'm with 'the one', the one that I want to be with forever. I only want to go there with him, whoever that may be and whenever that may be that I meet him. So that's why I'm not going to Venice now.

I also ummed and erred about going to Turin/Torino and Milan/Milano and the beautiful La Spezia/Cinque Terre region too but they'll have to wait until next time (as will the south of Italy!)

Reading Eat Pray Love (Elizabeth Gilbert) and The Promise (Lisa Clifford) also made me want to go to Italy badly.

And the last reason I want to go to Italy is a practical one. It's the closest foreign country to me apart from Germany and Switzerland, both of which I've already been to. I cannot stand flying and try to avoid it where possible. It's not a fear, I just hate all the waiting and queuing and stupid rules about luggage. I can't travel to anywhere I want to, it has to be reasonably close to be affordable and so I can get there within the same day.

I have my accommodation (Couchsurfing, of course) lined up for Genoa and Rome. I just need to find one for Florence now!

Unfortunately, at the back of my head, I'll still be wondering about "the issue" and am still waiting and waiting for more news...

Eh ben, Voilà !


Just before I wrote up this blog post, I noticed on Skype that Luca was online. I 'met' him around 21 months ago in July 2009 (through YouTube) when I first started to learn French and haven't spoken to him for over a year. He's from Rome so I said a quick "Hello" and told him I'm coming to Rome and it would be so cool if we could meet up. He wrote back that he doesn't actually live in Rome anymore but in.... Paris! haha (because he has a French girlfriend and I guess the long distance thing was too hard).

We got talking and he tells me he teaches languages online now (quitting his job in Rome as an engineer) and makes quite a good living from it. If you haven't checked out his YouTube videos you should. In fact, I'll put a link to it in my sidebar now. The earlier ones aren't great quality but anyway, he is a very talented polyglot (someone who speaks many languages) and shares his methods for learning foreign languages. The most incredible thing to me is not that he speaks several languages (which many many people do) but the fact that he has a close to native-like accent for each language that he speaks!! Even though we won't get to meet up it was still cool to talk to him again after a long absence from both our parts.

The Ex

During my break-up with my ex (in February) I was feeling extremely emotional but eventually got over him to the point where I no longer thought of him. And I realised that any nice feelings or thoughts I had about him weren't about him at all but more about the moments we shared and the stuff we did together.

Prior to us getting together today I had already pictured in my head how it would go down (because I think I know him well enough) and it went pretty much EXACTLY how I thought it would. It made me realise that I am completely and utterly over him and there are just too many bad qualities about him and I'm so glad I'm not with him, but also that I'm so glad I'm not with anyone! Relationships do my head in.

I did have some fleeting gushy feelings for him upon seeing him today after two months but then I realised that those were feelings of nostalgia, of our happy times together and not necessarily happy thoughts about him. I asked if he was seeing someone new now and he said he was and to be honest I feel a bit sorry for her. I don't think of my ex is a super nasty person but I do think he's a bit 'confused' about how relationships work and also I think he's too busy for a girlfriend anyway. He's one of those people who have all their free time booked up...

I did also learn that he changed jobs (and the city for the job) a month ago and earns more than he did before (but he says he is still looking elsewhere for a better paying job!). I also learned that he's going to Paris with his family to see an aunt during Easter and that's about all the information I got out of him in the 2 hours we spent together. In the car going back he did casually ask if I effaced (deleted) some photo albums of mine on Facebook and I said "No?" He said he was looking for a particular album of mine and couldn't find it. In all honesty I change my privacy settings so often I forgot who can/can't see what. When I got home now I had a look and yes, I had blocked him from seeing certain albums after he dumped me - ha! Wow, I admit I was somewhat flattered and shocked he was looking for a particular photo of me after dumping me....

The rest was a blur as we didn't say much and just admired the scenery/landscape (he drove me to a place we'd never been to before, near one that we had). Actually that was the weirdest thing for me and brought me a huge sense of nostalgia. I remember vividly the night we drove through the forest in the snow with a thousand twinkling stars in the sky. It was so damn cold and pitch black. Today it was day time, and 16° and sunny and reasonably warm for somewhere that is 1100m altitude. In fact, it looked pretty ordinary to me and I preferred the wintery scene... I said that it looked like we were in some dinosaur place with upended bits of dirt and grass and weird rocks of all sizes everywhere. It was so weird and he explained that because we had had such a dry winter (and also with snow covering the ground) it affected the grass/ground/plants which is why everything looked kind of weird, and dry and dead...

So it was and wasn't quite the 'conclusion' I'd hoped for between us but in the end I remain neutral. I definitely don't want to get back to him nor do I hate him for dumping me. I don't really feel anything at all. I forgive him for 'wronging' me. It was just something that happened in the past and I'm over it now. I'm glad we saw each other today to at least say goodbye for what would probably be the last time we ever see each other...

So why are you single?

It still amazes me how many comments and questions I get relating to my relationship status. I've been asked:

1• Did I come here because of a man?
2• Did I come here because of a relationship breakup back home?
3• Do I want to stay and marry a guy (and therefore can stay longer)?
4• Did I get a boyfriend recently?
5• WHY am I single?
6• Why do I travel alone everywhere?

Then, I've been propositioned and hinted by various men that they are interested in me (and I am NOT interested in them)! etc etc..

Gosh, it's so bizarre.

I'm not overly offended (and sometimes even find the comments funny) but at the same time I think my private life is MY business and if I wish to share those details I will. (on my blog here :P ) I am also surprised by the number of times someone has told me I should marry a French guy if I want to stay longer.

For the record, it actually isn't that simple and as far as I'm aware, isn't that simple for ANY desirable Western country. You don't just marry someone and automatically end up a French (or English or German or Australian or American whatever) citizen! There are many criteria to fulfill and you have had to live legally in the country for x number of years and proven your relationship is genuine.


And to answer the questions above:

1• Definitely not. I came here for ME. What a concept, eh?! (sarcasm). Actually, my father did not want me to come and he suspected someone had put me up to it as well. He asked, "WHO told you to come to France?" and I was very shocked by this statement but he's obviously over it now, well he had to get used to the idea as I wasn't changing my mind about coming!

2• Not at all. At the time I was in a (newish) happy relationship (which ended because the long-distance thing wasn't working for us).

3• If I end up marrying a guy it would be for love and honestly, I don't think I will get married for quite some time!

4• I did get a boyfriend here in January and it sort of happened really quickly before I realised what was happening and we didn't last very long but I think/hope/assume we are friends now (well I'm seeing him today for the first time after the break-up so I'll see how it goes).
So recently? Definitely not! I'm pre-occupied trying to sort out "the issue" which is completely doing my head in with all this waiting...

5• What a stupid question! Although I suppose I should be flattered because if someone asks that I assume it means they think that someone "like me" should NOT be single (as if that's a bad thing). To be honest (and as I've mentioned on this blog numerous times) I really enjoy my 'me time' and 'quiet time' and silence and meditation and all that. I think I'm quite independent now and whilst on one hand I'd love to be in a relationship, on the other hand I always feel like my emotions are in knots (particularly at the first few months of a relationship) and I don't feel quite right, and I'm quite strong-minded so I like to do what I want when I want and how I want... in a relationship I have to learn to compromise all over again... it's difficult but for the moment I'm quite happy where I am and do not feel any overwhelming need to be tied to/with someone. I do, however, feel like I need to make as many (platonic) friends as possible so I can have a nice social life to keep me occupied :)

6• It's just easier that way! When I ask someone if they want to go with me they usually stuff me around and don't give me definite answers. It's a billion times easier just to make some plans and go! Plus since I like to take photos, 99% of people (unless they are also really into photography) get extremely impatient and then I feel stressed and don't enjoy my time there OR take good photos... However, I do enjoy company for the day once I'm in that city. But to organise dates/transport/accommodation with others just feels like too much work these days.



Meanwhile, on the subject of taboo topics, I've heard time and time again that French people don't like to talk about money yet amongst most people I know they seem to talk about salary somewhat easily. People seem to ask and tell each other their salaries... I don't know if it's just the group of people I hang around or what! But as an Australian, I feel extremely uncomfortable talking about what I earn unless that person is very close to me. I have no idea what my friends earn back home (although I could make an educated guess based on their fields of work and years of experience). Since I heard that French people don't talk about money full stop I thought it might also be weird to ask how much they spend on certain things but I've asked various people how much they spend per month on rent (I like to compare between each city for reference's sakes) and they didn't seem offended.

I'm famous!!

The tidal wave of emotions continues today and this week...


I only found out too late that I won't be seeing some of my students next week because they're having exams meaning that THIS WEEK is my last is my last week with them and I wasn't prepared :( Still, I tried my best to organise what I could with what little time I have left. I'm particularly looking forward to tomorrow when I'm going to have a little farewell party with one of my favourite classes.

Meanwhile... I wanted to talk about Thursdays. Thursday mornings I had the worst classes ever. Two of them back to back. The teachers who organised those classes for me weren't even English teachers and would change the classes on me without advance notice which shitted me. The students even knew more than I did! So the last 2 Thursdays I turned up to classes with no students! Talk about a waste of a morning. Well no more. This time I made sure I wasn't needed so I didn't need to go.

Last Thursday I had a series of random events that led me to the town market. A few week's ago I went to my town's market for the very first time and last Thursday I went for the second time.

First I stopped by Carrefour to do some grocery shopping. Then, annoyingly, I really needed to use the bathroom except I had no idea where the public toilets were (I later realised there are some just nearby). So I called my friend who lives in town and works from home if I could quickly come over to use the toilet. By the time I'd finished buying the groceries I couldn't really wait any longer so I asked the cashier lady if there was a toilet I could use in the store (TOTALLY expecting her to say no, that they are for staff only). To my surprise she said there is a toilet out the back. I got lost along the way and then was directed there by another member of staff. Then when I came out I got lost again (it happens often to me when I use public toilets in unfamiliar places with lots of corridors!). I realised that it wasn't actually a public toilet at all as it was very out of the way, and that that lady was being nice to me by telling me where it was and letting me use it!

Since I no longer needed to use the toilet I didn't need to bother my friend anymore and so I went to the post office to post the little present to my friend in Paris that I forgot to bring with me. Then, randomly I decided to visit the town hall to enquire about who I should speak to about selling my photos to them.

THEN, I noticed that some roads were blocked off so I went to see what was happening. I should note that the weather that day was glorious. Sunny and warm. Ahhh the markets! I'd totally forgotten the markets were on and I was SO glad that I found them. I had so much fun browsing them this time in the sun (as opposed to the first time with my friend in the horrible rain and grey drizzly weather)... I thought I shouldn't be rude and go see my friend anyway (since he seems to enjoy my company and truth be told, I think he's interested in me which now makes things very awkward)... so after my market shenanigans I was kind of 'late' visiting him but we had a nice time talking anyway.

So with that in mind, and with no class this morning I was determined to go back to the markets again. I enjoyed it so much this time I just HAD to go back! And what happened was unbelievable. I had a smile on my face the whole time and my heart was singing. And dancing. I can't even explain it. I can't explain why. It just happened.

The weather these past 3 days has been awful. Grey, cold, windy, rainy. Awful. I had to drag out my winter coat again and felt like my hands were going to drop off in the mornings without gloves on.

Despite the cold and grey weather though, I was in a good mood. I arrived at 9am on the dot and the market was in motion. As good as the stuff is, I don't like to buy too much fresh food as I have nowhere to store it and I have to eat it pretty much immediately. I was on a mission to go and take photos only since I realised the ones I took last week weren't good enough!

The sellers were very curious about what I was doing. Now I should mention that in Sydney and most big cities, people get the shits with you when you try to take photos of them or their goods. I don't know why. People are so damn paranoid! I hate that. But these people were sooooo nice. They asked if they could help me or what I was after and I said I just wanted to take a photo. Instead of being annoyed or angry they were still as friendly as ever. Mais allez-y (go ahead) they said. And then they'd start a conversation with me. I got asked many times which newspaper I worked for! Haha. Actually that happened last week too. I said the photos are not for a publication, they are just for myself.

I got asked where I come from, if I was a tourist, what I'm doing in this town, why did I choose to come to this town, etc etc.

I even got asked if I wanted to take a photo of THEM which surprised me and I gladly did. Then they asked their neighbour to let me take a photo of them! There was such a happy, friendly, charming community vibe to it all. There was no hostility or sense of 'competition' between sellers and noone got annoyed if you didn't buy anything from them, even after tasting the delicious goodies. And they actually asked about your day and your life and take interest in it.

All I could think about at the back of my head was: If only I didn't have those classes each Thursday morning I could've done this a LONG time ago and make more friends quickly and easily.

I actually only planned on staying 30 minutes but ended up staying 1.5 hours! (well the bus only comes once an hour so it was one or the other). I ended up talking to a really nice guy who was more around my age (since most of the sellers are quite old) and I told him that I'm in the local paper today. He asked to see it but I said I haven't seen it myself yet! It was the second thing I planned to do this morning. Go to the Tabac Presse to buy several copies of the paper! He seemed really keen on seeing the article and asked me to show him once I'd bought it so I said OK. Then we got talking and he said he's from Morocco and came to France when he was 10. I talked about how the snow mesmerised me when I first saw it and he said the same thing happened to him during his first year in France!

At the Tabac Presse I bought 4 copies of the paper. 1 to keep pristine. 1 to show people and look at. 1 to send to my father and 1 to send to my mother (my parents are divorced). I proudly said to the shop owner, pointing to the cover (realising that my photo was on the freakin' COVER of the newspaper!) "Ca, c'est moi"

I was in a mega good mood when I left the market...

The last thing I did was - since it was so nearby - was visit my keycutter/bootmaker friend, to say hello AND goodbye :( He seemed SO happy to see me since it'd been months since we'd seen each other. We spent quite a while talking and he said I should come around next week and we can have a drink...

Then whilst I was waiting for the bus to go back I got a lovely surprise phone call from Karine.  I found her blog sometime last year. She's a French girl now living in Sydney (so basically the opposite of me). I really liked her blog posts and wrote to her. I had no idea she'd be so enthralled by my blog. In fact, I didn't even give her the URL so she must've looked for it herself. She said she wanted to chat to me some more over the phone or on Skype. Then I also found out that she blogged about me on her blog. Thank you Karine! :)

Then, I got a text message from C asking to have lunch with me so we had a very early lunch at 11:30am. Then I started gradually showing various staff my newspaper article. Ahh I was on a high and C was so happy for me too! Then after lunch I went and made lots of photocopies for everyone :P

The loveliest moment was when I spoke to the woman in admin. She seemed SO happy for me she said she wanted a copy for the principal too (who I wanted to see but wasn't around) so I gave her 2 copies. And then she said she will buy the paper tonight to have it in full glorious colour :)

I also put it on Facebook and emailed my photos the article to my friends and I got lots of nice comments on the photo too (which I took myself).

In my afternoon class I showed my students the article too... Ah, my 24 hours of fame. :D

And tonight, the staff member who wrote the article on me said he was at the train station and he bought me 2 copies! So nice! I honestly can't believe how many nice people I've met in this school and in this town.

Also today, I decided to organise a last minute farewell party for myself. I believe that there are certain events in life that need celebrating. I don't like party poopers who don't celebrate anything. So anyway, I decided that I WILL have a small farewell party afterall. So I frantically started asking and texting my friends here in this town...


On Saturday my ex sent me a text message. On Sunday I replied. Then after that I got nothing. I was meh about it.

I ummed and erred all afternoon about whether or not I should invite him to my farewell party. Considering it may be the last time we ever see each other I thought it should be the right thing to do. Afterall, I'm over him and I'm ready to be friends. And I harbour no negativity towards him. So tonight I sent him an invitation too. Since there would be others there too that would make it less awkward and personal too. He asked me what we're going to do and I said I'm not sure yet, hopefully eat out somewhere and do something else afterwards depending on what everyone feels like doing. I'm pretty open to ideas. To my surprise not only did he say, "ce serait avec plaisir" (with pleasure) he asked if we could see each other this weekend! (after I deciphered his heavily abbreviated textos). I said I'm not sure yet. Even though I'm over him I don't know what he's thinking or planning by having us get together alone.

Tonight I went to speak to one of the surveillants and saw him testing himself by trying to learn and memorise the departments of France . Hilarious!

Anyway, that's my exciting day. I actually feel quite OK about leaving now and not too sad. And I feel like I've accomplished a shitload (excuse the language) in my almost 7 months here! and I've definitely feel that I've made the wheel come full circle.

(image from here)

Nice, Cannes and Paris vacation

Saturday - Cannes

I've had the most incredible and amazing weekend and that is only because of the kindness and generosity of some "strangers". It never ceases to amaze me how someone who doesn't even know you and who has never seen/met you before can be so nice to you, and would treat you as nice as your own family or long term friends would treat you.

Well I've been stressed with "this issue" (that is still ongoing so the stress is still ongoing too!) and anyway I decided to make a last minute decision to take a trip down south (as I stated earlier in this blog). I wrote an email to a friend of mine as I vaguely remembered that he told me he grew up down there. I thought maybe he could suggest some things for me to see or do, although I did not explicitly ask him this. I just wrote him a vague and short message thinking maybe he would be happy and/or excited for me, that's all.

What I did not expect was... He suggested that I could stay with his mother who lives in the hills of Cannes, in a beautiful town 10 minutes away. At the time of me writing to him I had already contacted quite a few Couchsurfers in Nice and Cannes about staying with them but had not received a positive reply yet so I was overjoyed that he said that and said "Yes! I would LOVE to stay with his mother!"

A few hours later I got a reply from him saying he had called his mother and that I could stay with her and she would love to host me. I also received a lovely email from her herself.

Now about this friend... He's French and I met him in Shanghai when we were both living there. I put a message up on a forum asking if anyone knew where I could buy such a such a product and he said that he had it and that he could give it to me since he didn't need it anymore. I thought that was very nice and we agreed to meet up. We only spent a few minutes with each other and then we never saw each other again! But, we managed to stay in contact over the last 3.5 years (!!) purely by email. I wouldn't exactly say it was a strong friendship but the fact that we're still friends and in contact says a lot I think... Anyway, he was the first French person I became friends with.

Then, around the time mid-last year (2010) when I was getting ready to move to France he contacted me asking me if he knew of anyone who could offer him a job in Australia as he was looking for a way to immigrate there. Since he's an engineer I put him in contact with my father and he went back and forth over several months weighing up all his options. In the end he thanked me but he said he decided to go with another company who said they could sponsor him but first he had to spend some time in Hong Kong. So he's currently still living in Hong Kong but he recently got his permanent visa for Australia and can move there after he marries his current partner so he can bring her over too.

I can't help but wonder if he was nice to me because I was nice to him and (tried to) help him out? It's funny how when you're nice to people without expecting anything in return, you eventually get it back. I really believe in karma and this is just one example, I think.

So, to say that I was tired when I arrived in Cannes was a complete understatement. I'd stayed up to almost 1am the night before stressing over this "issue" and then I had to get up at 6am to leave by 6:30am to catch my train. It was quite cold and I left a bit too late and basically had to run to the train station. It was still a bit dark when I left and the air going into my ears was really cold, giving me a splitting earache (which feels like someone put hot pokers in them) so by the time I arrived I was out of breath, sweating with a throbbing head/ears. I almost blacked out. "No worries!" I thought (in my Australian accent). I'll just sleep on the train. Easier said than done!

Seriously, I THINK EVIL THOUGHTS ABOUT PEOPLE WHO TALK LOUDLY AND NON-STOP ON LONG PLANE OR TRAIN JOURNEYS. Honestly, I just want to scream WOULD YOU PLEASE SHUT THE FUCK UP AND SIT THE FUCK DOWN?! God Damn it. Why do people have to keep getting up and walking up and down? What the heck is wrong with them? And a train is PUBLIC transport. It's not your own bloody private living room and the whole world does not want to hear your goddamn inane conversation at 100 decibels for hours and hours on end!

The first half of my 6 HOUR train ride was OK and I got some rest but the second half was just hell and I gave up.

Reminded me of Sydney...

Then, minutes before my train was due to arrive in Cannes (bad timing) I got:
1) an SMS from a guy in Nice who said he could meet up with me and show me the town.
2) a call from a woman regarding "the important issue".

Since I was then in a tunnel I couldn't respond to either of them and then I had to get off the train, and then my friend's mother (C) was there waiting for me, warmly welcoming me.

She was talking and asking me various things and telling me about Cannes and to be honest I was distracted as hell because I really wanted to respond to both of those people but I thought it'd be a bit rude since we'd just met for the first time and she was so welcoming and happy to see me, etc and talking at a million miles a minute... So I just forgot about it for while...

My first thought was when I arrived was.... I feel like I'm back home in Sydney! The weather, the sun, the sea, the plants/trees/flowers. It all seems so familiar. The only thing that's really different (as always) are the houses and the architecture. I couldn't have been luckier with an 18°C day, sunny and a light sea breeze.

As much as I wanted to explore and see the city I actually wanted and needed to sleep. My head felt like mush and I actually felt like I'd been on a plane and passed through different timezones or something! So she took me back to her house (about 10 minutes drive away) and we had lunch. Then I rested for a bit (actually I tried to but I was so hyped up and pumped up and soooooo excited to be there that I couldn't!). I told her I really needed to use the internet and a printer to sort out this "issue" and I felt soooooo bad that I had to bother her with that and I felt so annoyed that I couldn't enjoy my holiday in peace. The whole time I couldn't really relax because I needed to sort out this "issue" and that was the reason why I had to cut my holiday short and go to Paris.

We had some problems connecting my computer to the internet and couldn't figure out why and she said she'd call her son. We ended up talking to him (in Hong Kong) on Skype and it's funny because I have NEVER spoken to him on Skype before! I don't even know his account username. And the first time I ever talk to him on Skype is at his mother's place! I spoke to him in both French and English and he said that my French had really improved.

It's funny... I remember the very first email I ever wrote to him in French well. I said something about "votre photos" and he corrected me and said that I don't need to "vous" him and to call him "tu" and that because photos are plural I need to say "tes photos". I'll never forget that!  Ahh... How far I've come in my French! :D

We didn't get the problem solved but I managed to solve it myself sort of by accident by trying a few different things with the buttons on the LiveBox. Hurray! I could finally get online to email the person about "the issue".

C and I had some tea around 4-5pm and then I really had to go and get some rest before her soirée! I knew there was no way I could stay awake if I didn't.

I slept till just before the guests arrived, at 7pm. God that sleep was heavenly. You have no idea how much I love staying over at strangers'/friend's places when they give me my own nice big room, with a big bed, and nice fresh clean crisp sheets. OMG it's heavenly compared to when I'm living in a tiny tiny room with a single bed. Every time that has happened I seriously don't ever want to leave! Also I often sleep better at other people's houses because it's much quieter than where I am at the school.

So her friends came over and they were all lovely. A lot of the time when you're at a party with people you don't know they often don't bother to include you in their conversation but they really made an effort with me, even offering to speak to me in English (but I said I preferred to speak French).

We had a delicious seafood Paella for dinner followed by a frozen dessert from Picard. Since my friend's mother is divorced and lives alone and has a busy social life (like all single people I know!) she doesn't have much time to cook so the Paella was bought and pre-made by a shop but it didn't matter because it and the dessert were both still delicious.

Her friends had been out sailing all day so were understandably very tired and it finished relatively early at around 10-10:30pm.


Sunday - Nice

The next day we were off to Nice! It worked out perfectly because by going with them I didn't have to worry about transport (lots of time and money saved - yay!), I get to spend time with them AND do my own thing because 2 of her friends (a couple) who had also stayed overnight at her place and her were going to see the opera.

Unfortunately, because I forgot to reply to this guy's SMS he told me he had changed his plans and was now doing something with some friends. I was a bit disappointed but had no hard feelings. I had so much fun exploring and walking around everywhere until I was even more exhausted than I thought possible. It was warm and sunny. C, being so motherly towards me, told me to bring my coat in case it got coat and I was annoyed I was carrying my winter coat in a backpack all day long when all I wanted to do was to put in a t-shirt. I was sweating like crazy in my long-sleeve top! I kept thinking and feeling I was back home in Sydney. It was a weird yet happy feeling and made me more homesick than ever. However I was extremely content to be in the beautiful south of France and was in no hurry to go back home yet.

This picture reminds me of California or Hawaii

Pebbly beach

Another (bad) thing that reminded me of Sydney was... I found my allergies returning! Strange. Or maybe not so strange.  Because I noticed that the trees, plants and flowers were very similar to what we have in Sydney I also happened to notice my allergies starting to flare up (which I never got in the whole 6 months+ that I've been here!) Prior to that unfortunate event I actually thought that I would LOVE to live in Nice. In fact, I would die to live in Nice. It is gorgeous and and a good size. It has wonderful culture and restaurants. And of course the beach/sea. It's unfortunate that the beach is made of pebbles and not sand though.

One of the first things we did after we parked the car in the underground carpark was walk through a farmer's market. Now of course I'd been to markets before in various cities in France but for the first time... I don't know why... maybe because of the warmer weather... I could really smell everything. I could smell the olives, the tomatoes, the oranges, the strawberries... My nose was being assaulted by the most delicious of flavours and taste sensations I was probably almost salivating. It was just heavenly.

First time I noticed these funky tomatoes ("coeur de boeuf" / heart of beef)!

We walked through several gorgeous streets of Nice (you know the typically French ones with that are narrow and cobble-stoned) before settling down in a big restaurant (La Claire Fontaine) overlooking Place Rossetti, a fountain and an old church. It all looked so Italian. Even many street and building names were Italian!

This is what I ordered:

Farandale des Mais 
Assortiment de pissaladière, tourte de courgettes, beignets de courgettes et d'aubergine, farcis niçois, poivrons au four.

It was beautifully presented and totally yummo (and something I had never tried before!)

After hearing great things about this well-known glacerie (ice cream shop) I was dying to have some! I only very rarely eat ice cream and so when I do I wanna make sure it's GOOD. I was told they have 100 flavours including cactus! I wasn't game enough to try it though. I did however want to try about 20 different flavours... I opted for the pina colada flavour since it's a taste I really like.

Then they took me to the Place Masséna (photos below) and then went to the watch the opéra. Now, because I didn't manage to reply to that guy in time we couldn't meet up and I was a little bit disappointed but not overly. Afterall, I had MORE than enough things to do in the 4 hours that I had. In fact it would be a race against time to see everything since Nice is quite big and I was only going on foot.

I was actually still pretty tired but had to forget about that and just keep walking and walking and walking... I felt so stupid to be carrying around a big winter coat when I was sweating like crazy.

I passed through a gorgeous tropical looking park with a carousel.

I did a bit of research the night before and wanted to go to the Théâtre de la Photographie et de l'image because 1) I love photography and 2) it's free! Whenever I'm visiting a city I like to still keep costs down and do as many free things as possible and there is usually always some kind of museum or art gallery that is free. Plus it was such a beautiful day I did not want to spend it inside so it would've been a waste of time/money to go to a bigger museum/gallery.

I saw the photos of German August Sander and a cute collection of old cameras right in the lobby of the building. It was enough culture for me because I wanted to make the most of the great outdoors!

I kept walking and walking wanting to get back to the sea again not realising just how big Nice was and how the map I had on me was really crap. I'd taken the wrong map with me when I left the house that morning and this was a bus maps which didn't show clearly all the little roads. That's when I got a bit lost and a random elderly gentleman came up to me and offered to help me! That was the FIRST time anyone in France had offered to help me when I was lost. Sure lots of times if I asked someone to show me where something was on the map they were polite and helpful but this time it was different!

And let's not forget the two random people who offered to take my photo for me (with my camera). That has NEVER happened before either. (Then, later, when I left Cannes, a young man offered me his seat at the station and that has never happened before either).


It really is true that the people down south are more easygoing and friendly.

Park with lots of people playing Pétanque

Setting the wheels in motion

Woah... it's all happening. My life is about to start a brand new chapter very soon. Meanwhile, I am so exhausted I can't even think. My brain and body are totally fried. I've had very little sleep all week because I've had insomnia thinking about all this 'stuff' and I've also been out every night which is so unlike me. Plus I've been in many long car rides on winding roads and after 6 months here, I still feel car sick every time...

• Wednesday night, got back at 8:30pm which isn't that late but considering I left at noon it was a freakin' long day.

• Thursday night, went and saw my new friend in town that I made through Couchsurfing (for the second time). Brought along one of my other friends, C, here at the school and the 3 of us had a great time/dinner. Got back at around 9:30pm.

• Friday night, one of my crazy friends M invited C and I to go out with her and her brother. The 4 of us had the best time! We had dinner in a gorgeous restaurant by a lake (at Aix les bains), and the waiters were all amazing with their service and smiles. The highlight for me were the glowsticks in our aperitifs and this hilarious dessert menu cover!! La sensualité de nos glaces. The sensuality of our ice cream. How 80s does that photo look? Is she supposed to be seductive?

Noone else found it as funny as I did. Probably because I was the only anglophone there! Another highlight for me was asking for ketchup for my fries. I am obsessed with ketchup but French people don't really use/like it so I'm always stuck using mustard (which I hate) or nothing. The waiter told me (jokingly) that I would change the taste of the food and make it worse but he still brought it to me with a smile (and not in the bottle but in a small glass shot-glass type container and with a spoon!). I'll also add that in this posh restaurant, the food wasn't even that expensive. And it was top notch.

After that we played 10 pin bowling which I really appreciated as I mentioned it's something I've been wanting to do for months. One of my other friends kept promising me he'd take me but he never did and M knew this, so she and her nice brother decided to take us there. C had never played it in her entire life (!!) so the 4 of us had a jolly fun time and then after that we went to the casino where I got stopped and wasn't allowed to enter :( because I didn't have any ID on me! It wasn't actually for age (France doesn't care too much about that) but because they need to verify you're not someone on a list for people who are banned from gambling! Oh well. I didn't mind. I don't particularly like gambling and poker/slot machines (machine à sous) anyway. The building was exquisite, opulent and gorgeous. There was also a charity auction going on and everyone coming in and out of there were dressed to the nines. Didn't get back till 1:30am.

• Saturday night, M suggested I should go out with her brother (again) and his friend from the Casino. She couldn't come though. I was a bit hesitant since I don't know him that well and had never met his friend. M tells me that this guy is really rich and will pay for everything and just go along and have fun... er... ok... so I did! I had no idea what he'd look like and how old he'd be. According to my guess, he was quite a bit older than us. Probably 45 or so. Oh well. I had a brief flashback to Le Divorce like what the heck am I getting myself into here? I'm going to have dinner with a rich, older man. OKOK it wasn't like that at all. Actually, it was NOTHING like that. For one thing, there was my friend's brother who was with us and it was just like 3 friends having dinner. Nothing more. I had a fun time teaching English to them and I actually believe that over the course of the evening they had improved! And yes, they both paid for me. Not that it was a super extravagant/expensive dinner anyway. But still, it was very nice of them. After that we went to a pub and they wanted to stay out later but I said I needed to get back since I had an early start on Sunday. Still, I got back at around midnight.

• Sunday. OK, so a few weeks back I met this guy through Shared Talk (a foreign language exchange website). From our very first chat we just got on like a house on fire. It's very rare that that happens but it happened for us. Then, he invited me to come over and check out his town. Even though he is on Couchsurfing as well, I still hesitated and cancelled because of some stupid articles I read about CS being dangerous and whatnot and then I got this stupid idea and re-read our chats over and over again and overanalysed EVERYTHING till I scared the crap out of myself for absolutely no reason to at all. Then I told myself I was being an idiot. So when he invited me the second time, I decided I HAD to go and put my fears aside. They were unfounded and it was just my imagination running away with me.

So, he picked me up at the station. Yes, what was I thinking? Getting into a car with a complete stranger? Well, first of all I have to say that the majority of people have a 'sixth sense' and if something doesn't feel right you can feel/sense it. I didn't feel there was anything scary or wrong about him or the situation at all. According to our chats I felt like I knew him quite well too. The first thing I did when I saw him was laugh because... he was wearing a beret and a blue/white striped shirt. He looked so ridiculously French and I asked if it was deliberate or not and he said no, and that he only bought the beret a week ago... in London!

So first thing we did was go to a pâtisserie to pick up something to eat, and then he drove me to this gorgeous look out place that we had already talked about during our very first chat! (there seems to be a lot of them in my (Rhône Alpes/Savoie/Haute Savoie) region).  Luckily it wasn't crowded at all even though it was a Sunday. The view looked down to Geneva and it was pretty impressive. We were at around 1200m altitude.

After that we went back to his place for me to drop off my bags and we were going to check out the Water Festival in Geneva (Fête de l'eau aux Bains des Pâquis). However, after my exhausting week I was too tired to go and said I just wanted to do nothing. Besides, it was really overcast and looked like it might rain. So we talked for a bit and then went out for a walk just around the local area which was exciting enough for me. And with all the flowers blooming for spring it was really beautiful. There was a beautiful park with an oriental style setting. After that we came back, talked some more and then went back out to pick up the 2 pizzas we'd ordered for dinner (by which time it really was raining). If there's one thing I've learnt about single people (including myself) is that they almost never cook. It is just such a pain (and washing up too) and it's expensive, and who the heck wants to eat alone all the time anyway?

We watched a DVD during/after dinner (the pizzas) and then stayed up till 1am and I had so much fun talking about life and random stuff I didn't want to go to sleep. We talked about so much stupid stuff, in both French and English.

That afternoon, he introduced me to a French herbal drug called Euphytose because I said I had been having some mild problems with insomnia because I was thinking too much about this 'matter' and then that night he introduced me to Limoncello, an Italian alcohol that tastes like Lemonade, and both times we joked that he was trying to drug me... Yes, I admit there was a tiny tiny part of my head that was still skeptical about WHY this person was being so nice to me???

He refused to let me help with or pay for anything. He was so unbelievably nice, just like all the other French people I had met on language learning websites or CouchSurfing and stayed with. Even more so. He said he wanted to show me "French gallantry" (and no, he wasn't charming in a fake, superficial way either. He told me he treats all his guests well). He even insisted that I sleep in his nice comfortable bed while he slept on the couch (which isn't long enough) despite me protesting about 10 times. There was nothing underhanded going on at all I'm pleased to say. He never acted inappropriately. I just feel so lucky to have met someone who would treat a 'stranger' so well.


On male-female platonic relationships

After recent events I've come to the conclusion that I really like being a single girl. It's so much fun. I can hang out with as many single men as I please and do whatever I want, really. And who doesn't like hanging out with someone who treats you so well? And not just one person, but several! Noone is going to get jealous or hurt (as long as no one develops feelings)... Plus, I'm still surprised that there are so many wonderful, kind, chivalrous men who do and pay for everything without even wanting anything in return. Yes, I was skeptical too but it's true, but they do exist. I have met many of them.

I guess this kinda explains some sentiments from women:

When a man is a gentleman to women (holds doors open, pulls our chair out, walks on the outside - like "whenamanloves" stated) women are either a) upset that he "doesn't think we can do it ourself" b) left in shock or c) think there is some ulterior motive.  They react like a, b and c because it's not common for men to be this way these days and if he does or says nice things to you then he "must be attracted to you in a romantic way" (he's not, if he is, he will tell you) or we're just simply blown away that this type of gentlemanly behavior actually still exists among some men. Or maybe we think they have some ulterior motive, maybe they just want to get in your pants? Well, that's not it either. Did you ever think that maybe their parents just raised them with high morals and values and they were taught to respect each other? Or if you react like "a" then you're probably just stuck in that "I'm the same as you, so don't treat me different" mentality.

I think most people have a funny idea about male-female relationships. Many people tell me they don't believe a platonic relationship is possible but I beg to differ. I have many male platonic friends and I don't have feelings for them or vice versa. If I did happen to have feelings and it wasn't reciprocated (or vice versa) I believe that that would be the end of the friendship and we'd have to stop hanging out otherwise it'd get too difficult and someone would be bound to get hurt.

Some people also have the idea that if you see a single male and single female hanging out there must be something going on between them. I think that is crap also!! I think the people who can't have an adult platonic relationship with a member of the opposite sex are just immature, frankly.

I don't particularly choose only males to hang out with but it just so happens that since I arrived in France and at this school I get along with them much better and easier than with females (even though all my good friends back home are female).


(picture from here).